my brassiere.
I’m talking about my boobs for a good cause!
For every comment that this post receives (up to 200) by midnight (PST) Friday, July 13th, I will donate a dollar to breast cancer research.
This post is for my mom who just finished breast cancer treatment; for Fatima who is one year post-treatment; and for Melissa who is in the middle of her battle. All of these ladies have – and are – kicking cancer square in the face.
Go, girls.
I am also linking this post up to YeahWrite – a great “supportive” place for bloggers who write and writers who blog.
Last but not least, this post is set to the best Beastie Boys song of all time, Paul Revere. If you’re not familiar with it, you may want to take 3 minutes to listen to it here.
All set? Let’s do this:
“My Brassiere”
Now here’s a little story I’ve got to tell
About two big ladies I know so well
It started way back in my pre-teens
When my flat little chest had nothing in between
I started to get curious about a “brassiere”
I could tell by how my shirts fit that the time was drawing near
Riding to the store, sitting shyly by my mother
I’d give this thing a try if she wouldn’t tell my brother
Two little boobies I see
I was hoping for some A cups but they sized up as a B
The store clerk was a measurin’ all the way around
I was workin’ up a scream, but couldn’t make a sound
She saw I was so nervous, feeling terrified
She said, “We’re done here, sweetie” and I could’ve just cried
Fast-forward a few years, how the time has flown
My little pre-teen boobies, how they’ve grown and grown!
Those tiny little B cups are now buxom double Ds
I keep them well supported or they’ll end up at my knees
I wear one when I run
Sometimes two (but just for fun)
Support is key here, girls, I even wear one to bed
All this talk of my big boobies might make your face turn a bit red
But I’ll tell you this right now, and this is no ha-ha
You’ve got to be good to your girls – they are your precious ta-tas
As for my two ladies, I support them all the time
Trust me, going braless would surely be a crime
And every month I feel them up to check that all is clear
The “C” word is no joke and one I don’t wanna hear
Now my drawers are overflowing with shades of black, pink and blue
I have so many brassieres, I don’t know what to do
But you can never have enough of these fine boulder holders
God knows I’ll need support as these two aging breasts grow older
You really can’t describe the power of these things
I’d trade my every diamond, all my golden rings
If I could just have one, I’d go for fancy and be done
Live life to the fullest and let your ladies have some fun
i love your post!!!
Thank you!! I love our boobs!!
I love mothers, sisters, aunts, grandmothers, girlfriend…and their boobies. Here’s to finding a cure and fighting like hell until there is one.
Love you and your blog too!!
Thank you so much, my friend! Love you too!
You are so funny!
Ladies, do have your regular mamo’s BUT do check the girls yourself … a lot … that’s how I found my lump and it was early detection and I was so lucky bc of that. Know what they should feel like and when they aren’t feeling the same.
And now to borrow Melisa’s famous:
Disclaimer: I did not check myself regularly (ok, hardly ever) and found the tiny lump when applying lotion which is like, by accident pratically.
And herein lies the reason I have John do my ta-ta checks! He is way more familiar with them than me.
TMI?
I love them, too. So much so that I might be turning into one; Kellie is always calling me a boob.
::::laughing::::
I will be thinking about YOUR twins for the rest of the day now. What a wonderful gift you have given me, my dear friend. Please have John put “my” dollar donation in that lovely brassiere. Consider it my gift to you. xoxo
I am here for YOU, my friend. And really, I’m not sure if you can call them twins. Well, definitely not identical. I kind of wish they were separated at birth, though.
TMI?
It is never TMI when it comes to your boobies.
P.S. Why yes, I DO realize this is the 2nd time I’ve written a blog post to the tune of Paul Revere. What can I say, the song is THAT good.
Love it! My grandmother just had two tumors and some lump nodes removed last week. She found her lumps herself. So ladies, young and old, feel yer boobies!
Ta-tas, unite!*
*Well, come together a little bit, but don’t join together as one. Mono-boob is not a good look on ANYONE.
Oh my god! You did something so amazing here. I love it. I love the song, the sentiment and the enthusiasm you brought to this piece. I have a huge smile on my face. Thank you!!!!
Oh, M2, I am so, so glad you put this up. And I darling that graphic.
Thank you (and the Eric with an “a” !) for giving me the push to post!
Bahahaah. I love the pic. I just went through my own breast cancer scare, biopsy (core needle and excisional) only to be told, B9. Thank God!! Scary as hell though. I hope those lovely ladies you named above kicks cancer’s teeth in.
Thank you! So glad to hear that all is well with you.
“You’ve got to be good to your girls!!” and you are! To your ladies and to your ladies … Supporting women and boobs! Can I make 200 comments? Because I will if you want me to. Great stuff!!
I was wondering if anyone would make that offer!
I highly doubt I’ll hit 200 or more but I had to cap this off somewhere! Even though I would give and give and give if my pocket book would let me. Thanks for stopping by!
Thanks for the donation for this cause! Let’s make sure we don’t lose more great people to this illness.
Agreed! Thank you so much for stopping by!
Love, love, love this!
Thank you so much!!! Cha-ching! Another buck for the boobs!
I love it! Going braless is definitely a crime for me, too.
The badges as a bra is BRILLIANT.
Oh blush, thank you! I’m banking that the graphic will pull in the win for me (KIDDING! Erica, if you’re reading this, I am JUST KIDDING!*)
*Disclaimer: mostly.
You go girl!!!!
Yay for boobs!
I’m a fairly new reader/subscriber and I Love this post!
Hi Keri! Thank you so much! I really appreciate your “support” and for stopping by.
I like a post with a good tune and a good cause. Lost my mom to breast cancer 12 years ago. She was only 53. Thanks for doing this.
Oh, Kelley. I am truly so sorry. I’m glad I can do a teensy little part. Thinking of you.
I had my second mammogram today! And I haven’t worn a bra in over two weeks! I am loving SUMMER! (Love the graphic. I’d wear that bra.)
You go girl!!! I :::wish::: I could go braless – for reals! Most of the time I love these ladies but maaaaan, the bra is THE THING I can’t live without!
What a generous idea! I love it. I have a friend who went through this. She kicked it too, I’m happy to say, and is doing great and feeling great! Like others have said, I love that yeahwrite brassiere!
Thank you so much!
Love this!
Thank you!
This cause is near and dear to my heart since I am a 14 year breast cancer survivor! What a great post
Oh congratulations!! Go, girl! And thank you!!
Haha! I love this! Thanks for sharing.
Thanks for stopping by!
I’m happy to help support everyone’s girls. Loved your post!
Thank you so much! There’s another buck for the boobs!
I love love love what you did with the lyrics and what you did with the YeahWrite buttons! So cute!
Thank you so much!! I wasn’t sure if many people would get the Beastie Boys song but I LOVE that song so I figured, meh, it’s my post so I’ll do what I want.
My mom is a breast cancer survivor so from the both of us….Thank you!
You are very welcome! Thanks for stopping by!
I love having that song stuck in my head! A clever poem for a fantastic cause.
Yay for Beastie Boys AND for boobies!
I rarely comment (not easy from the iPhone), but yesterday you made me laugh so hard I had to say something, and today, well it is for a good cause.
Arriba las bubis!!!!
Thank you thank you thank you! I am so grateful for your interest in my wee li’l blog!
I love your post!! I’m a new reader from runs for cookies!
Oh thank you so much! I’m so glad you’ve stopped by!
The badge was the perfect end to that post. I was just out today bra-shopping with my 12-year-old daughter. Here’s to the girls!
Thank you so much! That is funny timing with your daughter. Yay for the ladies!
the buck starts here
Ha ha ha! Finally, a comment from WK! And to think, it only took boobs. Surely we can get Jason to comment if we tell him it’s about boobs, no?
Love it! Boobs + Beastie Boys = WINNING
Thank you so much!!
While we struggle to contain the tits,
Those boulder-holders don’t come free!
Bras in multiple fabrics, shapes & fits,
Should come 2nd to self-exam for C!
Well done, you! Tits, tits, hooray!
Combining Beastie Boys and boobs? You are me hero! I SUPPORT your efforts
Why thank you so much! Boobies, unite!
Rockin’ tunes! I walk the Susan G Komen every year in Baton Rouge w/ my girlfriend who had a 2x masc at age 27…that was 3 years ago and she just had another baby! Kicking Cancers Ass! So glad your Mom’s treatment is O.V.E.R. Taking names, ladies….taking names…
YAY! What a huge WIN for your friend – good on her! Please tell her she has my SUPPORT!
What a wonderful way to support a wonderful casue! I walk the Susan G Komen every year in honor of many family members! YAY for you! I recently started following you after runs for cookies said she enjoyed you-I have to agree with her!
Oh my goodness, thank you so much! And thanks for all YOU do for this worthy cause as well!
Haha! This was great! You are so creative!!
Go boobies!!
thank you!! Yay for boobies!!
So creative and cute but makes you think too! What a great post – I so enjoyed reading it!!
Thank you so much – I really appreciate you stopping by!
I love this post! It reminds me of all of the silly songs I make up to get myself through the day, but yours has a very important purpose — well done!
Thank you so much! I love me some Beastie Boys AND healthy boobies!
Love the Yeah Write bra. You should market those. I would totally buy! Also, great, fun post! Wishing good health to those around you.
Ha! Maybe that should be the award given out. Especially funny for male winners!
Thank you!
This is awesome! Love Love Love it!
Awesome. And I totally know the feeling of being so young and watching them grow and grow and grow and OMG when will they stop growing!
I’m still wondering if they WILL EVER STOP????
Thank you!
What fun! Loved this. And, I’m still waiting for my “little boobies” to grow.
Thank you! I would share mine if I could! But totally not in a weird way.
I love the bras shaped ‘yeah write’ badge! I have a G cup. I will be having reduction surgery very, very soon. Because these things are killing my back.
Oh good for you. I just made an appt w/ a chiropractor because my back. kills. too.
Love your Beastie Boys Boobie Rap!!! And certainly a great cause.
Thank you so much! I love the Boys AND the ladies!!
OMG Melisa this is awesome. And the Yeah Write logo bra? Phenomenal.
Dude, do you know I am simply trying to keep up with you? No easy feat. THANK YOU.
Fun post! I, too, have some generous boobage and I also wear a bra to bed. I didn’t know other women did that, too!
Hello! Let’s start a Bed Bra Club!
I want to join too – is it ok that my boobs are a bit fake?? Like bags of salt water? Boy, can I make them sound sexy, eh? xoxo Mom
3rd time’s a charm! You have a rockin’ rack, Mom!
Yep, I sure did just say that to my own mother.
I think you’ve missed your calling as a lyricist!
A stretch, to be sure, but thank you!
I appreciate your “support”! That one just does not get old!
I loved it! So very creative – wow! A great idea, perfectly executed! Thank you!
Wow, thank you so much! Much appreciated!
Loved the post. Funny-just went for my first mammogram today and all I can say is ouch. I work as an oncology nurse (I give chemo) and there are so many young women with breast cancer that I just wanted my boobs checked.
BTW-your mom and friend might enjoy this post I had written: http://www.newdaynewlesson.com/it-changes-a-person/
Love this post. I have big ta tas too and support is key! I do the double up for jogging. My only negative about my big ones, the stares. Guys! Stop it!
hahahah this was AWESOME. but you wear one to bed? really? mine comes off the moment we walk in the door
Thank you! And YES! It’s more lightweight and no underwire, though. I call them my “night bras”. Sigh.
Great poem, great cause, thanks for sharing AND donating.
What a great idea!
Great rhymes, M.! Though it was *slightly* disconcerting to hear them in Mike D.’s voice, I gotta tell ya…
Love it! What a great idea Melissa.
Thank you so much! I appreciate you stopping by!
Genius and fun! Well done, you and your ta-tas! Happy to leave my comment for such a good cause.
Why thank you, ma’am! So glad you stopped by! And thank you for the follow!
I love your poem; it made me giggle! And for such a great cause – you’re awesome!
Thank you so much! I seriously considered tape recording myself singing it but no one wants to hear that. Including me.
I can’t think of a better use of poetry than boobs!
Maybe just big butts, but that song has already been written! x
Hysterical! I’m finally back in my pre-preggo, non-head o’lettuce-sized bras, but the girls will never be the same.
Thanks for the chuckle!
Thanks so much! Ahh, motherhood. The destruction of breasts for the creation of offspring. They’re lucky we love them!
Nice – I love that it was set to the Beastie Boys!! And what a great idea to donate to breast cancer research
Thank you so much! The boobies deserve it!
So fun. When I was breastfeeding, definitely slept in a bra. Back to Cs, now, though, so I don’t need one at night anymore. I didn’t realize I’d be so happy to be “small” again.
oh, I love the Beastie Boys too! So fun and for such a good cause. Erin
Yay! Thanks for stopping by, Erin! LOVE LOVE your blog!
Hey sis, not crazy about reading so much about your boobies but love the cause and so proud of what you are doing and the support you’re raising!!! And you are so creative and I couldn’t be more proud of how amazingly talented you are. I love you, Rob
Ha ha! Thanks, bro!! I really appreciate you checking out my BLOG – sorry about all the BOOB talk!!
If you want to wash this clear in your mind, go to the home page (now for something completely random) – you make the list, bro! And totally not in an awkward way. 
Love you!
Love me some Beastie Boys! And it’s tough to argue with $200 for cancer research!
Ha! Thanks so much! Cha-ching!
That is awesome! You sound like a remarkable person! Course you gei it honestly… Your mom is a jewel!
Hi Cindy! Thank you so much for taking the time to stop by and for your very kind words! I’ve heard so many wonderful things about YOU too – and I have to agree with you on my mom!
Have a great weekend.